Okanagan & Kelowna Wedding Photography

because I am not a goddess...

February 10, 2010

via

"Life has to be discovered from moment to moment, from day to day. It has to be discovered. It cannot be taken for granted. If you take it for granted that you know life, than you are not living. Three meals a day, clothing, shelter, sex, your job, your amusements and your thinking process-- that dull repetitive process is not life. Life is something to be discovered. And you cannot discover it if you have not lost, if you have not put aside what you have found. Put aside your philosophies, religions, racial taboos, customs, and all the rest of it. For they are not life." "A man who says he knows is already dead. But the man who says "I don't know" who is discovering, finding out, who is not seeking an end, not thinking in terms of arriving or becoming-- such a man is living, and that living is truth."

words by Krishnamurti-- whether he knew about life, the heart, the mind, the spirit, well now that's opinion. Regardless, in my opinion, these words are beautiful. And I hope you enjoy them the way I do. They make me feel not quite so weird when I sit, holding my breath, thinking about what I would be if I were a goddess. Not so alone in my searching I suppose. Discovering is a much nicer picture than someone holding her breath thinking about Life. Much nicer indeed.

Clark Gable line from Postal Service via days and hours

image by Rebecca Siewert Photography WELCOME! I am Katie, a photographer, momma and wife based in Kelowna BC. My love of photography stems from a desire to tell my clients’ stories in a real, honest way. My blog space stems from a love of many things, the good, the bad, the beautiful. I believe life is an adventure and hope you’ll enjoy my thoughts along the way.

image by Rebecca Siewert Photography

WELCOME! I am Katie, a photographer, momma and wife based in Kelowna BC. My love of photography stems from a desire to tell my clients’ stories in a real, honest way. My blog space stems from a love of many things, the good, the bad, the beautiful. I believe life is an adventure and hope you’ll enjoy my thoughts along the way.

Categories

There is a standoff in Kelowna about how to address the homelessness issue. There are people protesting about housing locations and not wanting them in "their" neighbourhoods. They are screaming and fighting against an enemy they don't understand. Because if they took one night and walked the "scary" streets, they would see these people are not their enemy. They are hurting and cold and troubled and scared. They are suffering from addiction and mental health issues and trauma so deep they may never pull themselves from their own hell. They are kind and generous and protective of their friends. Some of them are forever lost but some have the resilience to face their demons. And when they do they need support to take those demons on. They do not need a community split on what to do with them. They need help. And empathy. They need to be seen for who they are and not the mistakes they have made. @hopeokanagan is out every night seeing the women who most do not want to see. They are there to support them, to love them and offer a hand up when a woman asks for it. So if you are confused on this subject ask questions. Because you don't know until you see it. And if you want to know more, reach out and ask. Get involved. Donate if you can. There is a myth that says if we just keep the scary stuff out, we'll all be safe. But the chaos is still there. The injustice, the inequality, the unfairness and sad truths are all still there waiting to be seen. No amount of positive affirmations and smudging the air is going to change that, even though I wish so badly it could. We have to be willing to see it first. To open our eyes. And then we have to help just because we can.

There is a standoff in Kelowna about how to address the homelessness issue. There are people protesting about housing locations and not wanting them in "their" neighbourhoods. They are screaming and fighting against an enemy they don't understand. Because if they took one night and walked the "scary" streets, they would see these people are not their enemy. They are hurting and cold and troubled and scared. They are suffering from addiction and mental health issues and trauma so deep they may never pull themselves from their own hell. They are kind and generous and protective of their friends. Some of them are forever lost but some have the resilience to face their demons. And when they do they need support to take those demons on. They do not need a community split on what to do with them. They need help. And empathy. They need to be seen for who they are and not the mistakes they have made. @hopeokanagan is out every night seeing the women who most do not want to see. They are there to support them, to love them and offer a hand up when a woman asks for it. So if you are confused on this subject ask questions. Because you don't know until you see it. And if you want to know more, reach out and ask. Get involved. Donate if you can. There is a myth that says if we just keep the scary stuff out, we'll all be safe. But the chaos is still there. The injustice, the inequality, the unfairness and sad truths are all still there waiting to be seen. No amount of positive affirmations and smudging the air is going to change that, even though I wish so badly it could. We have to be willing to see it first. To open our eyes. And then we have to help just because we can.

I see you wrestling. Saying things you don't really mean and trying on different personas to see if they fit. I see you shedding the little kid version of you and wanting to step into the bigger version. But nothing really fits yet. This is the year you discovered the firing power of your words. That sorry doesn't always fix it and band aids don't always make things better. This is the year you are learning to take responsibility for your actions and those actions have consequence. And this is the year we're learning you're going to make mistakes no matter how much we hope you won't. So here we are baby finding our way in a new landscape. So to all the parents with older kids in curious how you dealt with the "big kid" shift? Because grade 3 has been a doozy for us and most of the other little girls we know.

I see you wrestling. Saying things you don't really mean and trying on different personas to see if they fit. I see you shedding the little kid version of you and wanting to step into the bigger version. But nothing really fits yet. This is the year you discovered the firing power of your words. That sorry doesn't always fix it and band aids don't always make things better. This is the year you are learning to take responsibility for your actions and those actions have consequence. And this is the year we're learning you're going to make mistakes no matter how much we hope you won't. So here we are baby finding our way in a new landscape. So to all the parents with older kids in curious how you dealt with the "big kid" shift? Because grade 3 has been a doozy for us and most of the other little girls we know.

Winter wonderland. The season is coming friends. 🏂

Winter wonderland. The season is coming friends. 🏂

The ghouls are coming for ya.

The ghouls are coming for ya.

When you travel, you are forced to be in your body. You are forced to be present. All the stories and patterns that fit you at "home" might not apply in a new place. It's a chance to become aware of all those things that aren't really you. It's a chance to whittle away at yourself and find out what's at the core and who you really are. Down every new alley there's an opportunity to meet yourself for the first time.

When you travel, you are forced to be in your body. You are forced to be present. All the stories and patterns that fit you at "home" might not apply in a new place. It's a chance to become aware of all those things that aren't really you. It's a chance to whittle away at yourself and find out what's at the core and who you really are. Down every new alley there's an opportunity to meet yourself for the first time.

Me and you. Our quiet days are numbered little buddy. Until then let's keep on adventuring. #smithwilly

Me and you. Our quiet days are numbered little buddy. Until then let's keep on adventuring. #smithwilly

🌚🎃

Sometimes parenting feels like an eternal uphill climb. And then you breakthrough to the summit and the view cracks open your heart and shines light into all those spots you never knew were there. Keep climbing.

Sometimes parenting feels like an eternal uphill climb. And then you breakthrough to the summit and the view cracks open your heart and shines light into all those spots you never knew were there. Keep climbing.

In case you didn't believe me about the whole snowing thing.

In case you didn't believe me about the whole snowing thing.

Back when we were knotty. Working on winning the lottery so we can all go somewhere hot and laze around and pretend it isn't snowing (because you guys it IS up here in the mountains) and we can also pretend the world isn't a shocking place but is just a big beautiful beach vacation. Who wants to come?

Back when we were knotty. Working on winning the lottery so we can all go somewhere hot and laze around and pretend it isn't snowing (because you guys it IS up here in the mountains) and we can also pretend the world isn't a shocking place but is just a big beautiful beach vacation. Who wants to come?

She was my very first friend at school. And 31 years later, I still think it was the best decision I ever made in school. She was definitely around when I made the worst decision which is still up for debate 😏

She was my very first friend at school. And 31 years later, I still think it was the best decision I ever made in school. She was definitely around when I made the worst decision which is still up for debate 😏

Some days I look around at my life with all the lovely things and all the roles I've become and I think "whoa I'm really fucking do this life thing" and I'm all passion and gratitude and seizing the day. And other days I feel like I'm in a Groundhog Day of telling my kids they can't do something I know I definitely would have wanted to do at that age, but I am now the destroyer of all things wild and fun and free spirited. And when they ask why not, I want to bend down and look them in the eye and say "I don't know I think that's just what adults say and I somehow turned out to be an adult when I swore up and down it would never happen." And some days I miss being stupid (so stupid) and selfish and smoking and drinking and pretending I would never have to grow up. I miss turning up to a job that didn't require much of me and pondering life's meaning on a beach somewhere with strangers who might become my lifelong friends, but more likely would fade off into the dawn. I miss falling in love every other week (so many heartaches) and thinking the key to life was just avoiding the pitfalls. I miss who I was when I wasn't someone's wife or someone's mom or someone's something but was just trying to figure out who I was in the first place. And then one of my kids grabs my face with both hands and says "can I PLEASE do the totally stupid and not even a little bit safe thing?" And I tell them to put on their damn helmets if they're going to try it. It's a complicated thing wanting to make the world safe and also give your kid the space to be dumb and reckless and feel all those feelings I know you need to feel to get wiser.

Some days I look around at my life with all the lovely things and all the roles I've become and I think "whoa I'm really fucking do this life thing" and I'm all passion and gratitude and seizing the day. And other days I feel like I'm in a Groundhog Day of telling my kids they can't do something I know I definitely would have wanted to do at that age, but I am now the destroyer of all things wild and fun and free spirited. And when they ask why not, I want to bend down and look them in the eye and say "I don't know I think that's just what adults say and I somehow turned out to be an adult when I swore up and down it would never happen." And some days I miss being stupid (so stupid) and selfish and smoking and drinking and pretending I would never have to grow up. I miss turning up to a job that didn't require much of me and pondering life's meaning on a beach somewhere with strangers who might become my lifelong friends, but more likely would fade off into the dawn. I miss falling in love every other week (so many heartaches) and thinking the key to life was just avoiding the pitfalls. I miss who I was when I wasn't someone's wife or someone's mom or someone's something but was just trying to figure out who I was in the first place. And then one of my kids grabs my face with both hands and says "can I PLEASE do the totally stupid and not even a little bit safe thing?" And I tell them to put on their damn helmets if they're going to try it. It's a complicated thing wanting to make the world safe and also give your kid the space to be dumb and reckless and feel all those feelings I know you need to feel to get wiser.

Spear fishing in Nicaragua 2012. 6 years later elodie still has the same undies. My mom game is 👌🏽

Spear fishing in Nicaragua 2012. 6 years later elodie still has the same undies. My mom game is 👌🏽

Sometimes you just need to hit pause. I think that's what it means to have grace. To know when the pause is needed... #kodakfilm

Sometimes you just need to hit pause. I think that's what it means to have grace. To know when the pause is needed... #kodakfilm

I see you.

When it feels like summer even in September. #outtakes

When it feels like summer even in September. #outtakes

Sometimes all you need is a tutu to make it a good Monday.

Sometimes all you need is a tutu to make it a good Monday.

I reached out to @hopeokanagan a while ago, because to be honest I was feeling like I was living in a bubble. I believe in the theory that there is a thread woven between all of us. Maybe you believe in God, or love or the universe. And it's easy to find that thing we believe in, in people like us. People who talk like us, look like us, do the same activities, practice the same principles. It's easy to be open minded when you are opening your mind to minds like your own. But can you find the same connection in people who are different than you? Can you see the mirror of yourself in someone who's life looks vastly different than yours? I think that's what @hopeokanagan is trying to do at its core. It's trying to bridge the gap and meet women in crisis where they are. And these two women are out every week meeting those women with small necessities, a shoulder to lean on, an ear to listen. They and all the other volunteers are putting themselves out there and saying I see you.

I reached out to @hopeokanagan a while ago, because to be honest I was feeling like I was living in a bubble. I believe in the theory that there is a thread woven between all of us. Maybe you believe in God, or love or the universe. And it's easy to find that thing we believe in, in people like us. People who talk like us, look like us, do the same activities, practice the same principles. It's easy to be open minded when you are opening your mind to minds like your own. But can you find the same connection in people who are different than you? Can you see the mirror of yourself in someone who's life looks vastly different than yours? I think that's what @hopeokanagan is trying to do at its core. It's trying to bridge the gap and meet women in crisis where they are. And these two women are out every week meeting those women with small necessities, a shoulder to lean on, an ear to listen. They and all the other volunteers are putting themselves out there and saying I see you.

You guys.... I haven't really been sharing my work work on here for a bit. But!!! This! This was for one of my absolute favourite companies in Kelowna. @urbanharvestokanagan has been the BEST service I have ever paid for. They are the best and oldest food delivery services in the okanagan. I started ordering their food box when it was just chad and I. And I have been a loyal customer since. Their service has saved my mom brain from imploding on itself. Every week new organic and local produce is delivered to your door, along with other goodies which you can add-on and customize every order. I LOVE the idea of supporting local growers and suppliers but the idea of stopping at 40 different vendors to grocery shop doesn't work for my life. Which is why I am forever grateful for @urbanharvestokanagan. Lisa (the owner) is an incredible woman and has an amazing staff of some of the best humans I've met. They take customer service to the next level. I can't say enough about them and tell all my friends about them when I get a chance. Working with them on this shoot was a dream so I wanted to tell you all about them in this gushy lovenote. If you live in the central okanagan I strongly suggest checking them out.

You guys.... I haven't really been sharing my work work on here for a bit. But!!! This! This was for one of my absolute favourite companies in Kelowna. @urbanharvestokanagan has been the BEST service I have ever paid for. They are the best and oldest food delivery services in the okanagan. I started ordering their food box when it was just chad and I. And I have been a loyal customer since. Their service has saved my mom brain from imploding on itself. Every week new organic and local produce is delivered to your door, along with other goodies which you can add-on and customize every order. I LOVE the idea of supporting local growers and suppliers but the idea of stopping at 40 different vendors to grocery shop doesn't work for my life. Which is why I am forever grateful for @urbanharvestokanagan. Lisa (the owner) is an incredible woman and has an amazing staff of some of the best humans I've met. They take customer service to the next level. I can't say enough about them and tell all my friends about them when I get a chance. Working with them on this shoot was a dream so I wanted to tell you all about them in this gushy lovenote. If you live in the central okanagan I strongly suggest checking them out.

Faded